My ex was on a work trip and a lady from his work sent me a video of him dancing and making out with a colleague of his. She wrote, girl do something you are losing your man. I was 6 months pregnant and trust me when I say that I was worried I would go into labor or have a miscarriage because my stomach started squirming. I was shocked because that’s not him. How could it be him? It turned out, you never know what people really are.
I called the lady and she told me that they just left for his hotel room. I called him but he didn’t answer me. I called 10 times and he didn’t answer. Then I called the lady and asked for the other woman’s name. She sent me her name and number. I made a group chat and wrote “I hope (her name) is worth hurting me and ruining our marriage. Have a good life (husband’s name)”
He called me within a few minutes after that text. I didn’t answer and I have never answered him or seen him again. He called me a couple of hundred times and texted me over 150 texts that night. I never read a single one. My heart couldn’t take it. I just called my mom in the middle of the night because I was worried about my health because the floors literally was spinning under my feet. Do cheaters realize the amount of pain and trauma they cause someone they claim to love? If they knew beforehand would it deter them?
I have never seen him again. My brother and his wife have been my rock and my way of communicating with him. Nobody is allowed to tell him where I live. I have full custody right now and this arrangement is until our son is old enough to start with shared custody arrangements. I am still on maternity leave but when I start working again, I have arranged to have my home office. Good luck trying to ambush me at my workplace “to just explain”. For 9 months now, I have been called everything under the sun from his side of the family about him just wanting to explain. I don’t understand what he wants to explain. What is there to explain? Whatever he did is self explanatory what more to talk about? Why is it so important to see me and talk in person? What can he tell me that would make his infidelity redeemable? What can he say to change my mind? I have made my wants very clear. Divorce and never see him again because I have spent nights on end trying to find anything that would make what he did forgivable in my books. I have tried and failed. I have done my part. But now I am the one who is in the wrong. I am the bad person because I don’t want to see the man who broke my heart. I don’t know, I feel like sometimes even my side of the family are thinking the same thing. That I have gone too far. This is not the adult way to handle things. I have made my point and now I need to face my fears and heartbreak. Maybe they have different motives than his family but it is still the same judgement. That I have taken this too far. Help me understand this please.